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Sunday, August 2, 2015

Dieting = the same survival mindset as being tortured/12 stages of grief/same mindset as PTSD/ Body policing (1984 style) by WLI

and kindle app/
Emotional Abuse - Any pattern of behavior directed at one individual by another which promotes in them a destructive sense of Fear, Obligation or Guilt (FOG).

"I really want to 2nd slice of cake, butg I can't because I am trying to lose weight/eat less/watch my calories."
Sound familiar? You are being manipulated by the abuse of narcissistic people and the abusive diet industry and bigoted sizphobic people

Stockholm syndromeStockholm syndrome, or capture-bonding, is a psychological phenomenon in which hostages express empathy and sympathy and have positive feelings toward their captors, sometimes to the point of defending and identifying with the captors.
"I am dieting." do you REALLY enjoy dieting? No one enjoy dieting. It seems subconsciously you are siding with your "captor" "It's hard at first, but it gets easier. Your body and mind get used to eating less and you can succeed. There is not need to eat less if someone doesn't want to). If they ate less they wouldn't need to start. People don't or should feel like they need to eat more or less or do something they don't want to, or change what they enjoy doing.

Minimisation - Minimisation is a type of deception involving denial coupled with rationalisation in situations where complete denial is implausible. It is the opposite of exaggeration. Minimization – downplaying the significance of an event or emotion - is a common strategy in dealing with feelings of guilt.  "dieting isn't THAT bad." "I will look great after losing those 20 pounds." 

You're either with us, or against us - The phrase "you're either with us, or against us" and similar variations are used to depict situations as being polarized and to force witnesses, bystanders, or others unaligned with some form of pre-existing conflict to either become allies of the speaking party or lose favor. The implied consequence of not joining the team effort is to be deemed an enemy. "you're either THIN which = healthy, pretty, or FAT=ugly,unhealthy."  "You either diet and be pretty/handsome and healthy OR don't and be disgusting and unhealthy and not a contributing member of society."

Shaming - The difference between blaming and shaming is that in blaming someone tells you that you did something bad, in shaming someone tells you that you are something bad. "fat-ugly, disgusting, repulsive, horrible, unhealthy,etc.)

Empathy Gap - Importantly, an inability to minimize one's gap in empathy can lead to negative outcomes in medical settings (e.g., when a doctor needs to accurately diagnose the physical pain of a patient) A doctor telling a patient he or she needs to lose weight based on that doctor knowing someone who may have died as a result of heart disease and was bigger(which could have been their eating habits, not nessessarily the amount of food they eat, and not being active).

Threat(ing) - A threat is an act of coercion wherein an act is proposed to elicit a negative response. It is a communicated intent to inflict harm or loss on another person. It can be a crime in many jurisdictions. Threat (intimidation) is widely seen in animals, particularly in a ritualized form, chiefly in order to avoid the unnecessary physical violence that can lead to physical damage or death of both conflicting parties."If you are fat and do not diet, you will die."

Emotional Blackmail - A system of threats and punishments used in an attempt to control someone’s behaviors."If you are fat and do not diet, as well tell you to do,or eat how we tell you to eat you to eat (not including eating healthy) you will die.." "You don't don't lose weight you're family and friends will not love you, you will not be around for them, lose weight for them, if you love them you would."

Pigeonholing - is any process that attempts to classify disparate entities into a small number of categories (usually, mutually exclusive ones).The term usually carries connotations of criticism, implying that the classification scheme referred to inadequately reflects the entities being sorted, or that it is based on stereotypes.1)Categories are poorly defined (often because they are subjective).2) Entities may be suited to more than one category. Example: rhubarb is both 'poisonous' and 'edible'. 3) Entities may not fit into any available category. Example: asking somebody from Washington, DC which state they live in.4)Entities may change over time, so they no longer fit the category in which they have been placed. Example: certain species of fish may change from male to female during their life. 5)Attempting to discretize properties that would be better viewed as a continuum. Example: attempting to sort people into 'introverted' and 'extroverted'.6) Criteria used to categorize entities do not accurately predict the properties ascribed to those categories. Example: relying on astrological sign as a guide to someone's personality.

Infrahumanisation (or infrahumanization) is the tacitly held belief that one's ingroup is more human than an outgroup, which is less human. The term was coined by Jacques-Philippe Leyens and colleagues in the early 2000s to distinguish what they argue to be an everyday phenomenon from dehumanization..... According to Leyens and colleagues, infrahumanisation arises when people view their ingroup and outgroup as essentially different (different in essence) and accordingly reserve the "human essence" for the ingroup and deny it to the outgroup. Whether a "subhuman" classification means "human but inferior" or "not human at all" may be academic.... "Fat people are unhealthy, THEY are not as healthy as US (thin people) "Fat people are not as sexy as US (thin people)

Dehumanization or dehumanisation describes the denial of "humanness" to other people. It is theorized to take on two forms: animalistic dehumanization, which is employed on a largely intergroup basis, and mechanistic dehumanization, which is employed on a largely interpersonal basis. Dehumanization can occur discursively (e.g., idiomatic language that likens certain human beings to non-human animals, verbal abuse, erasing one's voice from discourse), symbolically (e.g., imagery), or physically (e.g., chattel slavery, physical abuse, refusing eye contact). Dehumanization often ignores the target's individuality (i.e., the creative and interesting aspects of their personality) and prevents one from showing compassion towards stigmatized groups. The way people treat others who are not thin.

Moral disengagement is a term from social psychology for the process of convincing the self that ethical standards do not apply to oneself in a particular context, by separating moral reactions from inhumane conduct by disabling the mechanism of self-condemnation. People treating bigger people like crap to "shame them until they lose weight." Don't shame anyone, ever.

Stanford prison experiment (SPE) was a study of the psychological effects of becoming a prisoner or prison guard.The participants adapted to their roles well beyond Zimbardo's expectations, as the guards enforced authoritarian measures and ultimately subjected some of the prisoners to psychological torture. Many of the prisoners passively accepted psychological abuse and, at the request of the guards, readily harassed other prisoners who attempted to prevent it. The experiment even affected Zimbardo himself, who, in his role as the superintendent, permitted the abuse to continue.Two of the prisoners quit the experiment early, and the entire experiment was abruptly stopped after only six days, to an extent because of the objections of Christina Maslach.
The Milgram experiment on obedience to authority figures was a series of social psychology experiments conducted by Yale University psychologist Stanley Milgram. They measured the willingness of study participants to obey an authority figure who instructed them to perform acts conflicting with their personal conscience.
- Shows how people will blindly follow anything they are told especially if it comes from authority or they are given any power. People want power over others. This is true in many personal trainers,doctors,etc. when it comes to control someone's looks and weight and people who will listen to them even though they know it's stupid, incorrect and dumb. And medical students who may know fat can be healthy, but decide to listen to the bullshniz they are told and harm others with it.

Thought suppression is when an individual consciously attempts to stop thinking about a particular thought.It is often associated with obsessive–compulsive disorder (OCD). OCD is when a person will repeatedly (usually unsuccessfully) attempt to prevent or "neutralize" intrusive distressing thoughts centered on one or more obsessions. It is also related to work on memory inhibition. Thought suppression is relevant to both mental and behavioral levels, possibly leading to ironic effects that are contrary to intention. The way society and medical field tries to suppress any body love / self love thoughts.

Locus of control - In personality psychology, locus of control refers to the extent to which individuals believe they can control events affecting them. "I can control my appetite." .

Dehumanization may be carried out by a social institution (such as a state, school, or family), interpersonally, or even within the self. Dehumanization can be unintentional, especially on the part of individuals, as with some types of de facto racism. State-organized dehumanization has historically been directed against perceived political, racial, ethnic, national, or religious minority groups. Other minoritized and marginalized individuals and groups (based on sexual orientation, gender, disability, class, or some other organizing principle) are also susceptible to various forms of dehumanization. The concept of dehumanization has received empirical attention in the psychological literature. It is conceptually related to infrahumanization, delegitimization, moral exclusion, and objectification. Dehumanization occurs across several domains; is facilitated by status, power, and social connection; and results in behaviors like exclusion, violence, and support for violence against others.

Delegitimisation (also spelled delegitimation) is literally the withdrawal of legitimacy, usually from some institution such as a state, cultural practice, etc. which may have acquired it explicitly or implicitly, by statute or accepted practice. Denying any justice or moral support from the legal system for a bigger person. "Eric Garner died because of his weight." Ummm.. he died because he was choked. That is usually what happens when someone is choked. 

Religious paranoia is an irrational fear of being purposefully attacked by an outside agent(s) in or through some religious context. Some examples: The fear of one's soul being stolen. The fear of being tempted by demons.The fear of being plotted against by cultists. The fear of being a target of God or Satan. Gluttony. Which isn't about food.  It's talking about money,clothing,drinking,etc. 

Harassment - Any sustained or chronic pattern of unwelcome behavior by one individual towards another. && Bullying - Any systematic action of hurting a person from a position of relative physical, social, economic or emotional strength.*You look gross and disgusting, lose weight." "You're not healthy, lose weight." "You'd be prettier/more handsome if you lost weight." "lose weight, nasty.You look gross."

Intimidation - Any form of veiled, hidden, indirect or non-verbal threat. *Here is a diet book.* "I need a diet partner, lets diet together." *someone (doctor,friend,family member) gives bigger person information about diabetes, obesity statistics, heart disease death statistics, etc.* 

Raging, Violence and Impulsive Aggression - Explosive verbal, physical or emotional elevations of a dispute. Rages threaten the security or safety of another individual and violate their personal boundaries *People tend to get angry and have a short fuse when dieting.* *People want food and feel they can't eat it or can only eat so much and want more. They tend to get irritated.* Your body wants food and needs food and you are restricting it thus you are going to get angry and irritated.

Chaos Manufacture - Unnecessarily creating or maintaining an environment of risk, destruction, confusion or mess. *Everything the diet industry and sizist medical doctors tell you.*

Chronic Broken Promises - Repeatedly making and then breaking commitments and promises is a common trait among people who suffer from personality disorders. "Lose it and keep it off! It's easy!" "People will love you more if you lose weight and eat less." "You will be a better person if you lose the weight."

 "carrot and stick" - The "carrot and stick" approach (also "carrot or stick approach") is an idiom that refers to a policy of offering a combination of rewards and punishment to induce behavior. It is named in reference to a cart driver dangling a carrot in front of a mule and holding a stick behind it. The mule would move towards the carrot because it wants the reward of food, while also moving away from the stick behind it, since it does not want the punishment of pain, thus drawing the cart. "Lose weight,get a new dress."  "lose weight gain positive self-esteem, instead of giving yourself self love now, WAIT UNTIL you LOSE weight." "lose weight be loved by your peers, or stay fat and be shunned."

Hyper Vigilance - Maintaining an unhealthy level of interest in the behaviors, comments, thoughts and interests of others.

Suggestibility - Suggestibility is the quality of being inclined to accept and act on the suggestions of others. A person experiencing intense emotions tends to be more receptive to ideas and therefore more suggestible. Generally, suggestibility decreases as age increases. However, psychologists have found that individual levels of self-esteem and assertiveness can make some people more suggestible than others, which has resulted in the concept of a spectrum of suggestibility."You would be prettier/more handsome if you lost weight." "Oh, look at this dress, too bad it is a tad too small." *Fat jokes*  *The impression in movies, tv, etc. that  a fat person is ONLY attractive when that person is funny* *We can diet and do this together*

Psychological repression, or simply repression, is the psychological attempt made by an individual to repel one's own desires and impulses toward pleasurable instincts by excluding the desire from one's consciousness and holding or subduing it in the unconscious. Repression plays a major role in many mental illnesses, and in the psyche of the average person

Defensive pessimism - Individuals use defensive pessimism as a strategy to prepare for anxiety provoking events or performances. When implementing defensive pessimism, individuals set low expectations for their performance, regardless of how well they have done in the past. Defensive pessimists then think through specific negative events and setbacks that could adversely influence their goal pursuits. By envisioning possible negative outcomes, defensive pessimists can take action to avoid or prepare for them. "I might eat the entire bag of chips if I have a few, so I will not have any at all, that way I can stick to my diet and weight loss plan."

Alienation - The act of cutting off or interfering with an individual's relationships with others. What dieting culture does to people. Don't go to the beach until you are thin, don't enjoy yourself or love yourself until you are thin, don't date until you are thin, you're not a good mother or father unless you are thin.

Imposed Isolation - When abuse results in a person becoming isolated from their support network, including friends and family.What dieting culture does to people. Don't go to the beach until you are thin, don't enjoy yourself or love yourself until you are thin, don't date until you are thin, you're not a good mother or father unless you are thin.

Idiosyncrasy credit - is a concept in social psychology that describes an individual's capacity to acceptably deviate from group expectations. Idiosyncrasy credits are increased (earned) each time an individual conforms to a group's expectations, and decreased (spent) each time an individual deviates from a group's expectations. Edwin Hollander originally defined idiosyncrasy credit as "an accumulation of positively disposed impressions residing in the perceptions of relevant others; it is… the degree to which an individual may deviate from the common expectancies of the group".
Yay!! You get some credits, chubby, for going on the diet you hate and despise. You LOSE credits when you think for yourself and try to love yourself.

Unnecessary personal distress - an aversive, self-focused emotional reaction (e.g., anxiety, worry, discomfort) to the apprehension or comprehension of another's emotional state or condition. This negative affective state often occurs as a result of emotional contagion when there is confusion between self and other. Referring to get together and holidays as "obstacles" or "anxiety ridden" because of the food and fear of overeating, "preparing" for holidays and get together because they know they will want to eat 'more' and are scared to gain weight back. If you want a cupcake or something, eat them. Don't stress, worry or feel ashamed because you want two or three pieces or servings!

Avoidance - The practice of withdrawing from relationships with other people as a defensive measure to reduce the risk of rejection, accountability, criticism or exposure. Referring to get together and holidays as "obstacles" or "anxiety ridden" because of the food and fear of overeating, "preparing" for holidays and get together because they know they will want to eat 'more' and are scared to gain weight back. sometimes avoiding those events all together, or avoiding people if they gain weight back or until they lose a certain number of pounds.
escape distance &&& flight-or-flight - ??????????? *People planning on how to leave before desert even though they WANT to stay and socialize but are afraid they may eat too much, etc*

Intellectualization is a defense mechanism where reasoning is used to block confrontation with an unconscious conflict and its associated emotional stress where thinking is used to avoid feeling.It involves removing one's self, emotionally, from a stressful event. Intellectualization may accompany, but is different from rationalization, the pseudo-rational justification of irrational acts. *people may not want to argue so they just go on a diet even though they do not want to*

Splitting (also called black and white thinking or all-or-nothing thinking) - the failure in a person's thinking to bring together both positive and negative qualities of the self and others into a cohesive, realistic whole. It is a common defense mechanism used by many people. The individual tends to think in extremes (i.e., an individual's actions and motivations are all good or all bad with no middle ground). "ALL fat people are unhealthy;therefore,MUST lose weight to be healthy" "i am fat;therefore I AM unhealthy, a bad person and ugly."
Can also be included in "Always" and "Never" Statementss - Declarations containing the words "always" or "never". They are commonly used but rarely true. "fat people never exercise or eat healthy." "fat people are always unhealthy." "diabetes, heart disease,etc are always caused by being fat." *actually those are caused by the foods we eat such as too much refined sugar, not by being fat or by sugar itself and thin people who eat alot of sugar can have diabetes.*

Proxy Recruitment - A way of controlling or abusing another person by manipulating other people into unwittingly backing “doing the dirty work”.Proxy recruitment can be an extremely powerful way of establishing control over another person. It forces the victim into a defensive posture - justifying themselves or denying false claims to friends, family, neighbors, acquaintances and authority figures. It often attempts to reverse roles in the eyes of others - casting the abuser as the victim and portraying the victim as the real abuser. It also deflects attention away from the abuser and provides cover or justification for further abuse to occur. "You have to lose weight if you want to be healthy, or live a longer life. This is on you if you get sick because you will not lose weight. "Those studies that state fat people can be healthy are false. If you do not lose weight I will need to refer you to a dietitian before I can treat you for anything else." "You need to see a dietitian." "I am sending you to a weight loss surgery surgeon." "lets go see a weight loss surgery surgeon together." *interventions for fat camp,etc.*

Objectification - The practice of treating a person or a group of people like an object.People should look a certain way if they want to be accepted. They are objects that are only good for our entertainment and need to look as we tell them to look.

Invalidation - The creation or promotion of an environment which encourages an individual to believe that their thoughts, beliefs, values or physical presence are inferior, flawed, problematic or worthless. "Yes, i see you and hear you tell me that you eat healthy, exercise, are physically active throughout the day, have a clean bill of healthy and are emotionally well, but fat people are unhealthy, and are depressed."

Lack of Conscience - Individuals who suffer from Personality Disorders are often preoccupied with their own agendas, sometimes to the exclusion of the needs and concerns of others. This is sometimes interpreted by others as a lack of moral conscience. "You MUST lose weight. Here are some diet pills that could kill you, but you can lose 20 pounds." "These diet products cause cancer,etc. and can harm to others but at least you will be thinner." "We don't care shaming you because of your body makes you want to die, we need to shame you into losing weight even though you are healthy and happy now."

Frivolous Litigation - The use of unmerited legal proceedings to hurt, harass or gain an economic advantage over an individual or organization.*people who can't get medical care,or are sided against in a court of law, or are denied something they need based on their weight.*

False Accusations - Patterns of unwarranted or exaggerated criticism directed towards someone else aka the smear campaign. "fat people are not healthy and need to lose weight even if they do not want to.""so and so is overweight and must have a disease." "You haven't tried hard enough to lose weight." "Just stop eating so much." "You must have an illness or mental illness if you can't stop eating."

sublimation is a mature type of defense mechanism where socially unacceptable impulses or idealizations are unconsciously transformed into socially acceptable actions or behavior, possibly resulting in a long-term conversion of the initial impulse. "It's okay to make fat people feel bad, because if we do they will finally be healthy and be okay to look at. Lets all push them into hating themselves until they diet and lose weight society will not mind as society says this is okay because we have to make everyone thin." 

Normalizing - a tactic used to desensitize an individual to abusive, coercive or inappropriate behaviors. In essence, normalizing is the manipulation of another human being to get them to agree to, or accept something that is in conflict with the law, social norms or their own basic code of behavior. "It's okay to make fat people feel bad, because if we do they will finally be healthy and be okay to look at. Lets all push them into hating themselves until they diet and lose weight society will not mind as society says this is okay because we have to make everyone thin." 

Somatization - a tendency to experience and communicate psychological distress in the form of somatic symptoms and to seek medical help for them. Fat people have pains most likely due to stress and maybe even because it is "expected of them?. Fat people are "expected" to have heart disease, diabetes,etc.

Charm offensive - A "charm offensive" is a related concept meaning a publicity campaign, usually by politicians, that attempts to attract supporters by emphasizing their charisma or trustworthiness. - Wikipedia

Fear mongering - Fear mongering (or scaremongering or scare tactics) is the use of fear to influence the opinions and actions of others towards some specific end. The feared object or subject is sometimes exaggerated, and the pattern of fear mongering is usually one of repetition, in order to continuously reinforce the intended effects of this tactic, sometimes in the form of a vicious circle. "You HAVE to be thin if you want to be healthy, pretty/handsome, and be noticed.""If you aren't thin you will die from 'obesity related disease' even though thin people get those diseases as well. Lets not look at WHAT you are eating, stressors,etc. but your outside which has nothing to do with the inside."

Throffer - is a proposal (also called an intervention that mixes an offer with a threat which will be carried out if the offer is not accepted.  "you must diet, or die." "You must be thin, or die." "You must lose weight, or I will not treat you for something that is wrong."
--All About - Throffer
--@Recovery from Mormonism

Coercion - is the practice of forcing another party to act in an involuntary manner by use of intimidation or threats or some other form of pressure or force. It involves a set of various types of forceful actions that violate the free will of an individual to induce a desired response, usually having a strict choice or option against a person in such a way a victim cannot escape, for example: a bully demanding lunch money to a student or the student gets beaten. These actions can include, but are not limited to, extortion, blackmail, torture, and threats to induce favors.

Gimmick - In marketing language, a gimmick is a unique or quirky special feature that makes something "stand out" from its contemporaries. However, the special feature is typically thought to be of little relevance or use. Thus, a gimmick is a special feature for the sake of having a special feature. It began, however, as a slang term for something that a con artist or magician had his assistant manipulate to make appearances different from reality.  Based on the recent trend of actually loving yourself:"All bodies are beautiful, YOU are beautiful, we aren't like the OTHER diet food companies, but we are going to sell you this diet product or the idea of dieting/diet culture." "Here is a heartfelt story about overcoming weight loss and loving yourself even more after losing the weight. You can totally identify with it, right?Then, if you relate to it you should lose weight just like he/she did!"

Praise (conditioning)  - Praise refers to positive evaluations made by a person of another's products, performances, or attributes, where the evaluate presumes the validity of the standards on which the evaluation is based. Tell people they look better thinner and they will want to be thin. INSTEAD of telling people to accept themselves and giving them positive reinforcements for loving themselves. There is no "put a dollar in a jar for everyday you love yourself." "get a new dress for every week you smile at your beautiful body in the mirror."  just"put a dollar in a jar for every pound you lose." "ONLY buy a new dress AFTER losing 10 pounds." Telling people to accept themselves will = no control over someone and as society, we can't have that,can we?

Love bombing -  Love bombing is an attempt to influence a person by lavish demonstrations of attention and affection. The phrase can be used in different ways. Members of the Unification Church of the United States (who reportedly coined the expression) use or have used it to convey a genuine expression of friendship, fellowship, interest, or concern. Critics of cults use the phrase with the implication that the "love" is feigned and that the practice is psychological manipulation in order to create a feeling of unity within the group against a society perceived as hostile.
"We LOVE and care about you but we are going to shame, ridicule,and make you feel worthless because of your outside exterior."

Victim blaming - Victim blaming occurs when the victim of a crime or any wrongful act is held entirely or partially responsible for the harm that befell them. The study of victimology seeks to mitigate the perception of victims as responsible. "You failed ona  diet, it's YOUR fault." "You got shot in the face, it's because you are fat." "You can't breathe because a pillow is over your face and a killer is trying to suffocate you, well, it's your weight that is causing you to not be able to breathe." "You have cancer, it's because YOU'RE fat.""You have diabetes it is because you are fat, not because you eat a lot of refined sugar and thin people who eat a lot of refined sugar also have diabetes."

Superficial charm - Superficial charm (or glib charm) is the tendency to be smooth, engaging, charming, slick and verbally facile. The phrase often appears in lists of attributes of psychopathic personalities, such as in Hervey M. Cleckley's The Mask of Sanity, and Robert D. Hare's Hare Psychopathy Checklist."Lose weight and let US help you feel GREAT because being fat is unhealthy! (even though our products are loaded with artificial sugars and ingredients that cause cancer and other diseases at least you will be thin )

2 + 2 = 5 - From George Orwell's 1984an example of an obviously false dogma one may be required to believe..... It is contrasted with the phrase "two plus two makes four", the obvious (by definition) – but politically inexpedient – truth. Orwell's protagonist, Winston Smith, uses the phrase to wonder if the State might declare "two plus two equals five" as a fact; he ponders whether, if everybody believes it, does that make it true?  "dieting is amazing for you, you will live longer. It's stressful, shaming you for who you are, going against natural cues and what your body wants, and psychologically torturing, but it's all worth it in the end. You should look how we tell you to look and feel and think. We will feed you bullshniz lies about how only thin people are healthy and how eating too much makes you unhealthy and when you try to think for yourself we will shame you in society and the medical health field because you are wrong despite countless studies that prove fat CAN be healthy and we are correct."

Rationalisation - In psychology and logic, rationalization or rationalisation (also known as making excuses) is a defense mechanism in which controversial behaviors or feelings are justified and explained in a seemingly rational or logical manner to avoid the true explanation, and are made consciously tolerable – or even admirable and superior – by plausible means. It is also an informal fallacy of reasoning.Rationalisation happens in two steps:A decision, action, judgement is made for a given reason, or no (known) reason at all (in cases for instance of dogmatic judgement or normal behaviour).A rationalisation is performed, constructing a seemingly good or logical reason, as an attempt to justify the act after the fact (for oneself or others).Rationalization encourages irrational or unacceptable behavior, motives, or feelings and often involves ad hoc hypothesizing. "We don't like fat people, therefore all this mean stuff we say about them is true. They ARE unhealthy. We need to change them because they are unhealthy."

Psychologically, doing this to ourselves puts a huge toll on our psyche even though after all of it we THINK we have succeeded, we haven't. Our mind is trying to survive and it seems it thinks it is going through a tragic event.

Grief - Grief is a natural response to loss. It is the emotional suffering one feels when something or someone the individual loves is taken away.Grief is also a reaction to any loss. The grief associated with death is familiar to most people, but individuals grieve in connection with a variety of losses throughout their lives, such as unemployment, ill health or the end of a relationship "I have to start my diet tomorrow, ugh." "I dread this diet, but I have to do it."

Stages  of grief
1. DENIAL - "It's a lifestyle change," "I have to lose weight to be healthier," "I WANT to lose weight.For ME and NOT because society's pressures to be thin or the medical field's sizism"
2. ANGER - "I REALLY want that f*ing piece of cake!" "I'm sick of this!"
3.BARGAINING - "If I can just lose 5 pounds i will feel better," "If I eat that cookie, I will not eat a snack later."
4. DEPRESSION - "I just really would love to eat that piece of cake and cookie without gaining the weight back, but i know if i do I will set myself back so I will not have it. I'll smile look happy on the outside, but feel sad because i just a couple cookies."

Egonomics is a form of self-management first proposed by Thomas Schelling in his paper "Egonomics, or the Art of Self-Management." Schelling suggested that individuals suffer from a sort of split-personality disorder whereby the present self wants a specific thing (e.g., eating a cookie) but the future or past self wants a different thing (e.g., losing weight). Both selves exist, but do not exist at the same time. Eat the f*ing cookie :)

Obedience, in human behavior, is a form of "social influence in which a person yields to explicit instructions or orders from an authority figure".Obedience is generally distinguished from compliance, which is behavior influenced by peers, and from conformity, which is behavior intended to match that of the majority. Obedience can be seen as immoral, amoral and moral - We must obey the doctors and people telling us to be a certain size, or else.

In psychology, cognitive dissonance is the mental stress or discomfort experienced by an individual who holds two or more contradictory beliefs, ideas, or values at the same time, or is confronted by new information that conflicts with existing beliefs, ideas, or values "Fat is beautiful and can be healthy, BUT people should lose weight." "I am fat and beautiful and healthy, but i am going to/want to lose weight and put myself through the stress of watching what i am and not being able to eat what I want just to lose some pounds."

Cognitive Distortions:
All-or-nothing thinking (or dichotomous reasoning): seeing things in black or white as opposed to shades of gray; thinking in terms of false dilemmas. Splitting involves using terms like "always", "every" or "never" when this is neither true, nor equivalent to the truth. *see above*
Should statements: doing, or expecting others to do, what they morally should or ought to do irrespective of the particular case the person is faced with. This involves conforming strenuously to ethical categorical imperatives which, by definition, "always apply," or to hypothetical imperatives which apply in that general type of case. Albert Ellis termed this "musturbation" "Fat perople should diet and lose weight"
Overgeneralization: Making hasty generalizations from insufficient experiences and evidence. Making a very broad conclusion based on a single incident or a single piece of evidence. "one fat person has heart disease so they all must have heart disease."
Mind reading: Inferring a person's possible or probable (usually negative) thoughts from their behavior and nonverbal communication; taking precautions against the worst reasonably suspected case or some other preliminary conclusion, without asking the person. "she/he is fat they have heart disease, diabetes,etc. poor them,i feel bad for them, they must have it so hard." "he/she is eating a large pizza, they must be so lonely and depressed or have a eating problem and we must help them."
Blaming: the opposite of personalization; holding other people responsible for the harm they cause, and especially for their intentional or negligent infliction of emotional distress on us. "fat people are to blame for healthcare costs skyrocketing,and the country's epidemic of diseases" - even though it's the harmful chemicals in food "products" that are causing these diseases.
Labeling and mislabeling: a more severe type of overgeneralization; attributing a person's actions to their character instead of some accidental attribute. Rather than assuming the behavior to be accidental or extrinsic, the person assigns a label to someone or something that implies the character of that person or thing."she is miserable because she is an overweight biotch, not because she has had a horrible week."
Fallacy of change – Relying on social control to obtain cooperative actions from another person. "lets ostracize fat people so they will fit into what we think they should be and what we want."
Always being right – Prioritizing self-interest over the feelings of another person. "lets sell weight loss to bigger people regardless of how we make them feel. We are correct and any studies that show otherwise are wrong. Even though overweight people can be healthy, we are right and they are wrong. We need to beat this (non-existent) obesity epidemic into the ground regardless of how many people we harm mentally or physically. There is money to be made and egos to protect"

Scapegoating - Singling out one child, employee or member of a group of peers for unmerited negative treatment or blame.*blaming a person being overweight on the fact he or she has diabetes, or heart diease and not looking at the fact he or she eats a lot of heavily processed foods, fast foods, and doesn't exercise. his or her brother or sister lives the same kind of lifestyle and has diabetes but isn;t overweight the blame for that person having diabetes and heart disease is placed on the fact it must"run in the family or is heredity." They are blaming the person's weight instead of the food they are eating.

Emotional Abuse - Any pattern of behavior directed at one individual by another which promotes in them a destructive sense of Fear, Obligation or Guilt (FOG).

Verbal Abuse - Any kind of repeated pattern of inappropriate, derogatory or threatening speech directed at one individual by another. "fat ass" "You're fat and disgusting." "Betterlose weight fat ass." Etc,etc.etc.

Targeted Humor, Mocking and Sarcasm - Any sustained pattern of joking, sarcasm or mockery which is designed to reduce another individual’s reputation in their own eyes or in the eyes of others. *Those lovely fat jokes*

Ranking and Comparing - Drawing unnecessary and inappropriate comparisons between individuals or groups. "fat people are ____, ____, and ____ and thin people are  _____, _____, ______."

Raging, Violence and Impulsive Aggression - Explosive verbal, physical or emotional elevations of a dispute. Rages threaten the security or safety of another individual and violate their personal boundaries.often called fury or frenzy is a feeling of intense, violent, or growing anger. It is sometimes associated with the fight-or-flight response and often activated in response to an external cue, such as an event that impacts negatively on the person. The phrase, "thrown into a fit of rage", expresses the immediate nature of rage that occurs before deliberation. - Wikipedia *people on diets are hostle and always on edge, and sometimes get angry very easily.

Catastrophizing - The habit of automatically assuming a "worst case scenario" and inappropriately characterizing minor or moderate problems or issues as catastrophic events."You will die if you don't lose weight.

Stalking - Any pervasive and unwelcome pattern of pursuing contact with another individual. *email ads, ads in magazines and on tv about weight loss/ diet products.* *friends and family who keep bringing up weight loss/dieting* *friends and family who keep bringing up weight loss/dieting AFTER you let it known you are not interested in it.*

 Testing - Repeatedly forcing another individual to demonstrate or prove their love or commitment to a relationship."If you love your family or children you will lose weight." "If you lose me/us you will lose weight." "If you want me to be your doctor, or if you respect me as your doctor you will listen to me and lose weight.

Gaslighting - The practice of brainwashing or convincing a mentally healthy individual that they are going insane or that their understanding of reality is mistaken or false. The term “Gaslighting” is based on the 1944 MGM movie “Gaslight”. - "Those studies showing how you can be healthy at any size are not accurate, you must have gotten them from an unreliable source like, Harvard, Yale and numerous science and medical magazines. Don't listen to them. Those studies never really existed, 
they got thrown out  or never really became popular. You don't really know what you are talking about."

Sumptuary laws from Latin sumptuariae leges) are laws that attempt to regulate permitted consumption. Black's Law Dictionary defines them as "Laws made for the purpose of restraining luxury or extravagance, particularly against inordinate expenditures in the matter of apparel, food, furniture, etc." Traditionally, they were laws that regulated and reinforced social hierarchies and morals through restrictions, often depending upon a person's social rank, on permitted clothing, food, and luxury expenditures..... and often were used for social discrimination."

Projection - The act of attributing one's own feelings or traits to another person and imagining or believing that the other person has those same feelings or traits. "I feel fat people should diet so THEY must feel they have to diet, but just don't know how or do not have enough control." "I feel this person should lose weight, so he or she must WANT to, let me give them advice."
Grooming -  Grooming is the predatory act of maneuvering another individual into a position that makes them more isolated, dependent, likely to trust, and more vulnerable to abusive behavior...An predator will identify and engage a victim and work to gain the target’s trust, break down defenses, and manipulate the victim until they get whatever it is they are after. Overt attention, verbal seduction (flattery / ego stroking), recruitment, physical isolation, charm, gift-giving, normalizing, gaslighting, secrecy, and threats are all hallmarks of grooming. Abusers who groom their victims often claim to have a special connection with the abused. The so-called connection might be emotional, intellectual, sexual, spiritual, or all of the above. This is often backed up by the predator echoing back part of the target's own background or story, altered to fit the groomer’s back-story, in order to confirm the connection.  "I was in the same spot as you when i was overweight.... i know how you feel."
No-Win Scenarios - When you are manipulated into choosing between two bad options "Diet or weight loss surgery."
Lying - Lies and liars come in all shapes, and in shades of white, grey and black. What distinguishes the more extreme forms of lying is the degree of harm they cause and the extent to which the behavior becomes habitual or uncontrollable. "there are no studies that show that fat people can be healthy."

"#3) Sociopaths are incapable of feeling shame, guilt or remorse. Their brains simply lack the circuitry to process such emotions. This allows them to betray people, threaten people or harm people without giving it a second thought. They pursue any action that serves their own self interest even if it seriously harms others. This is why you will find many very "successful" sociopaths in high levels of government, in any nation.

#4) Sociopaths invent outrageous lies about their experiences. They wildly exaggerate things to the point of absurdity, but when they describe it to you in a storytelling format, for some reason it sounds believable at the time.

#5) Sociopaths seek to dominate others and "win" at all costs. They hate to lose any argument or fight and will viciously defend their web of lies, even to the point of logical absurdity.

#10) Sociopaths are delusional and literally believe that what they say becomes truth merely because they say it! Charles Manson, the sociopathic murderer, is famous for saying, "I've never killed anyone! I don't need to kill anyone! I THINK it! I have it HERE! (Pointing to his temple.) I don't need to live in this physical realm..."

 Archetype. The concept of an archetype /ˈɑrkɪtaɪp/ is found in areas relating to behavior, modern psychological theory, and literary analysis. An archetype can be:a statement, pattern of behavior, or prototype which other statements, patterns of behavior, and objects copy or emulate...
The "Good fatty" archetype. They are expected to not be too "loud," or too "bold." They are expected to dress frumpy and never ever provocative as thin people should, be depressed and hate their body.They should be lazy and never ever move because they are "so" unfit. They are expected to want to diet and want to lose weight to fit in with the rest of society. (I don't agree with the statement that eating healthy and exercising is a "good fatty" archetype. Of course everyone should eat healthy (not necessarily less) They "need" to keep physically fit, but o course fat people are expected to be lazy and never exercise because "they can't" or "don't want to," yet many bigger people do. Just like thin people, many do, many don't, everyone should.

"Drinking the Kool-Aid" is a figure of speech commonly used in North America that refers to a person or group holding an unquestioned belief, argument, or philosophy without critical examination. It could also refer to knowingly going along with a doomed or dangerous idea because of peer pressure. The phrase oftentimes carries a negative connotation when applied to an individual or group. Doctors, medical books, anything that states "obesity" as a disease. People who believe "obesity" is a disease, or eating a lot is a disease.

Moral panic - an intense feeling expressed in a population about an issue that appears to threaten the social order."We have an obesity epidemic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Not really. We may have an unhealthy eating and sedentary lifestyle epidemic, but a body size can not be an epidemic.

Role - Our "role" in society is to look a certain way and eat a certain way and feel a certain way.

Halo effect -  is a cognitive bias in which an observer's overall impression of a person, company, brand, or product influences the observer's feelings and thoughts about that entity's character or properties. It was named by psychologist Edward Thorndike in reference to a person being perceived as having a halo"Slim fast and nutrisystem would never lie to me, they want me to be healthy and love myself." Even though their parent company makes all those snacks, plus many ceos of these companies have stock in Pfizer, a pharmaceutical company. There are so many dangerous chemical additives to these foods just so they can save a buck. They don't care about your health, they care about making a profit off of your insecurities.

Sexualization - make something sexual in character or quality, or to become aware of sexuality,especially in relation to men and women. Sexualization is linked to sexual objectification. According to the American Psychological Association, sexualization occurs when "individuals are regarded as sex objects and evaluated in terms of their physical characteristics and sexiness." "In study after study, findings have indicated that women more often than men are portrayed in a sexual manner (e.g., dressed in revealing clothing, with bodily postures or facial expressions that imply sexual readiness) and are objectified (e.g., used as a decorative object, or as body parts rather than a whole person). In addition, a narrow (and unrealistic) standard of physical beauty is heavily emphasized.
- "Look how hot you will be and feel (as though bigger people can't and don't feel sexy) once you lose 20 pounds." "The only way you will be loved is if you look hot and not because of your personality, or talents."

Mind control (also known as brainwashing, reeducation, coercive persuasion, thought control, or thought reform) is a theoretical indoctrination process which results in "an impairment of autonomy, an inability to think independently, and a disruption of beliefs and affiliations. In this context, brainwashing refers to the involuntary reeducation of basic beliefs and values" - What all this is. They are trying to control what you f*ing eat and how much. They are trying to make everyone hate you based on what you look like. they are trying to sell you products and make you hate yourself based on something so shallow. They know no one can weigh 80 pounds;therefore, they push that idea so when you can't reach that weight they can make you feel worse and making you vulnerable to listen to what they say and more vulnerable to make you buy their products.

In cultural anthropology, a shame society, also called shame culture or honour-shame culture, is a society in which the primary device for gaining control over children and maintaining social order is the inculcation of shame and the complementary threat of ostracism. A shame society is contrasted with a guilt society, in which control is maintained by creating and continually reinforcing the feeling of guilt (and the expectation of punishment now or in the afterlife) for certain condemned behaviors, and with a fear society, in which control is kept by the fear of retribution. "Lose weight, or we are allowed to pick at your body and tell you how disgusting you are."

In cultural anthropology, a guilt society, or guilt culture, is the concept that the primary method of social control in a given society is the inculcation of feelings of guilt for behaviors that the individual believes to be undesirable. It is possible to classify societies, specifically apollonian ones, according to the emotions they use to control individuals, swaying them into norm obedience and conformity. According to this classification, a guilt culture is an alternative to a shame culture. Shame cultures are typically based on the concepts of pride and honour, and appearances are what counts, as opposed to individual conscience in guilt cultures.The distinction was first coined by E. R. Dodds in The Greeks and the Irrational (1951) "You will die, think of your family.""Don't eat so much, think of the starving children in Africa."

Victimisation (or victimization) is the process of being victimised or becoming a victim.  - We are ALL victims of the diet industry and diet culture. We need to break free from that victim mentality and become free from guilt, shame, and self hatred.

The open-question argument is a philosophical argument put forward by British philosopher G. E. Moore in §13 of Principia Ethica (1903), to refute the equating of the property of goodness with some non-moral property, X, whether naturalistic (e.g. pleasure) or meta-physical (e.g. God's command). That is, Moore's argument attempts to show that no moral property is identical to a natural property. The argument takes the form of syllogistic modus tollens:Premise 1: If X is (analytically equivalent to) good, then the question "Is it true that X is good?" is meaningless.Premise 2: The question "Is it true that X is good?" is not meaningless (i.e. it is an open question).Conclusion: X is not (analytically equivalent to) good.*People who think eating less is best can shut up."

The is–ought problem, as articulated by Scottish philosopher and historian David Hume (1711–76), states that many writers make claims about what ought to be on the basis of statements about what is. Hume found that there seems to be a significant difference between descriptive statements (about what is) and prescriptive or normative statements (about what ought to be), and that it is not obvious how one can coherently move from descriptive statements to prescriptive ones."  Everyone ought to be thin, but reality IS that they are not. Fat people OUGHT to be unhealthy, but reality IS that they are not all the time, unhealthy or you could think.

The fact-value distinction is a distinction between what is (can be discovered by science, philosophy, or reason) and what ought to be (a judgment agreed to by consensus, or believed to be objectively morally binding). The terms positive and normative represent another way to express this, as do the terms descriptive and prescriptive, respectively. Positive statements make the implicit claim to facts (e.g., water molecules are made of two hydrogen atoms and one oxygen atom), whereas normative statements make a claim based on values or norms (e.g., water ought to be protected from pollution)."Fat people can't possibly be health;therefore,they aren't even though there is science that proves they can be."

Persuasion is an umbrella term of influence. Persuasion can attempt to influence a person's beliefs, attitudes, intentions, motivations, or behaviors. In business, persuasion is a process aimed at changing a person's (or a group's) attitude or behavior toward some event, idea, object, or other person(s), by using written or spoken words to convey information, feelings, or reasoning, or a combination thereof. Persuasion is also an often used tool in the pursuit of personal gain, such as election campaigning, giving a sales pitch, or in trial advocacy. Persuasion can also be interpreted as using one's personal or positional resources to change people's behaviors or attitudes. Systematic persuasion is the process through which attitudes or beliefs are leveraged by appeals to logic and reason. Heuristic persuasion on the other hand is the process through which attitudes or beliefs are leveraged by appeals to habit or emotion. Persuading people into believing they ARE unhealthy because they are fat and they must lose weight. Great marketing for products and to gain control over someone's body. They make people hate themselves, and wheel in profits. People make others hate themselves and wheel in the control they have over them ("You dislike yourself, you should diet" - that person now has control over your body. Great narcissist tactic.

**Narcissists love to have control over others. Telling someone to diet instead of loving his or herself is a great way to gain that control over someone's habits and self esteem and to fit into what they want the person to be instead of accepting them for who they are.
 Also see my "NPD abuse tags at my support blog

Misplaced loyalty (or mistaken loyalty, misguided loyalty or misplaced trust) is loyalty placed in other persons or organisations where that loyalty is not acknowledged or respected; is betrayed or taken advantage of. It can also mean loyalty to a malignant or misguided cause. Social psychology provides a partial explanation for the phenomenon in the way "[T]he norm of social commitment directs us to honor our agreements. [...] People usually stick to the deal even though it has changed for the worse". Humanists point out that "[M]an inherits the capacity for loyalty, but not the use to which he shall put it [...] may unselfishly devote himself to what is petty or vile, as he may to what is generous and noble
"We  trust and respect the diet industry and doctors who push weight loss,especially weight loss pills and products, even though they have caused so many deaths. More deaths than being obese has." - Remember, it's unhealthy eating and sedentary lifestyles that has caused a lot of these deaths, thin people have also died because of those problems. ate  healthy, exercise, keeping active throughout the day is the best way to live a long life not weight.

In Organizational Communication: Balancing Creativity and Constraint, Eric M.Eisenberg defines reification as “the process whereby socially constructed meanings come to be perceived and experienced as real, objective, and fixed, such that members ‘forget’ their participation in the construction of those meanings.” In any culture, social norms are started and maintained by members of that particular society, so much so that overtime these norms become a routine and it’d be unorthodox to go ahead and try to change them. It's been accepted as true that fat people are unhealthy, and depressed. To see a fat person who is outgoing and loves his or her self is weird to these people. To hear of a person who is healthy and fat is usually not well received by people (those fabulous online doctors everyone loves.) and can't "possibly be true, because fat people are always unhealthy."

Body policing (1984 style)
(Body)Thought Policing - Any process of trying to question, control, or unduly influence another person's thoughts or feelings [or body] OOTF "those fat can be healthy studies aren't true, blindly follow the body type we tell you to be." "here is a pill lose weight, don't think for one second you are worth anything until you are what we want you to be (thin)."

Thought Crime -  thoughtcrime is an occurrence or instance of controversial or socially unacceptable thoughts. The term is also used to describe some theological concepts such as disbelief or idolatry,or a rejection of strong social or philosophical principles. "how dare you think you can be attractive, stand out and be amazing or healthy, fatty. Get covered up and eat less." This is especially true for Tess Holiday and her haters. she is committing thought crime since she is going against society's norms and showing fat people you CAN be sexy and don't have to hide away or lose weight to be sexy.

Illegal activity
“Falsifying Documents” is a type of white collar crime. It involves altering, changing, or modifying a document for the purpose of deceiving another person. It can also involve the passing along of copies of documents that are known to be false. In many states, falsifying a document is a crime punishable as a felony - Studies "showing" that fat people can be healthy are either shoved off as "untrue" or disregarded all together. Many studies showing that bigger people can't be healthy ARE funded by companies selling weight loss products.

Bribery is the act of giving money, goods or other forms of recompense to a recipient in exchange for an alteration of their behavior (to the benefit/interest of the giver) that the recipient would otherwise not alter. Bribery constitutes a crime and is defined by Black's Law . Many studies showing that bigger people can't be healthy ARE funded by companies selling weight loss products.Doctors getting money for prescribing weight loss pills although they are harmful.

Criminal Fraud - A white collar crime that includes any act intended to deceive through a false representation of some fact, resulting in the legal detriment of the person who relies upon the false information.The essential elements needed to prove criminal fraud include:1) Misrepresentation of material facts. 2)By someone who knows the material fact is false. 3)With intent to defraud. 4)To a person or entity who justifiably relies on the misrepresentation. 5)Actual injury or damages results from the reliance. Doctors getting money for prescribing weight loss pills although they are harmful.Many studies showing that bigger people can't be healthy ARE funded by companies selling weight loss products.

Withholding information - To keep known information from someone with intent to mislead.Doctors and (some) scientists not publishing (you can actually find fat can be healthy studies in many numerous credible non-biased science and medical magazines and articles including studies from Yale.

Dieting is like a cult and the diet industry and doctors who push it are the cult leaders
  1. Why Do People Join Cults? @Psychology Today
  2. Cult FAQ @
  3. Top 5 Reasons People Join Cults {hint: it's not because they're stupid} - 1. We Have What You've Been Looking For.2 Sense of Urgency 3. Sense of Purpose 4. Sense of Superiority 5. INCENTIVES!!!  Sound like something? "You will look sooooo good, you will be healthier, lose weight now!"

  • Who Joins Cults, And Why? @ Apologetics Index  - factors include:1.A desire to belong.2 Unassertiveness (the inability to say no or express criticism or doubt) 3.Gullibility (impaired capacity to question critically what one is told, observes, thinks, and so forth) 4.Low tolerance for ambiguity (need for absolute answers, impatience to obtain answers) 5.Cultural disillusionment (alienation, dissatisfaction with the status quo) 6.Idealism 7.Susceptibility to trance-like states (in some cases, perhaps, due to prior hallucinogenic drug experiences) 8.A lack of self-confidence 9.A desire for spiritual meaning 10.Ignorance of how groups can manipulate individuals
  • Study: Cult, "Cults Questions And Answers" full-text 76K  
  • Cult: a group or movement exhibiting a great or excessive devotion or dedication to some person, idea, or thing, and employing unethically manipulative techniques of persuasion and control designed to advance the goals of the group’s leaders, to the actual or possible detriment of members, their families, or the community.  Unethically manipulative techniques of persuasion and control include but are not limited to: isolation from former friends and family, use of special methods to heighten suggestibility and subservience, powerful group pressures, information management, suspension of individuality or critical judgment, promotion of total dependency on the group and fear of leaving it, etc.... "You must diet if you want people to love you." "We will not love you or do this for you if you don't diet." "I will not give you medical care if you don't lose weight and are not thin." "Don't you want your family to love you? Lose weight." - Then, you feel like you are not loved when you don't.  *The pressure to be thin* 
    Contemporary cults, then, are likely to exhibit three elements to varying degrees:
    1. members’ excessively zealous, unquestioning commitment to the identity and leadership of the group. "EVERYONE SHOULD GO ON A DIET AND BE THIN!!!"
    2. exploitative manipulation of members; and harm or the danger of harm to members, their families and/or society... "You'll children will love you more if you lose weight. You can be a better person." - As though you are not a good person  and your family doesn't love you now. "We love you, please loose weight." Conditional love same as "we love you, please go join a cult."
    3. dictate sometimes in great detail how members should think, act, and feel; "You shouldn't put too much food into your body." "You should WANT to lose weight."
    4. claim a special, exalted status (for example, occult powers, a mission to save humanity) for themselves and/or their leaders; and intensify their opposition to and alienation from society at large."You'll gain a better view of life when you lose!" "What will you gain when you lose?" - Special K. "Obesity is a disease, we must stop it" - they want to "save" humanity from some disease that isn't even a disease, it's a body type. UNHEALTHY EATING and sedentary lifestyle is an epidemic, but not obesity (thin people eat unhealthy and don't exercise, too)

  • Deadliest Cults | SERIOUSLY STRANGE  Rob Dyke

  •                                                                  Anorexic-like thinking.
    You watch what you eat, obsess over food,obsess over your weight,etc.
    1. You can eat without thinking about it. For those not in the know, anorexics think about food a lot. The food they're not eating. A lot. I would tally calorie lists, plan out meals and -- when I was dating my boyfriend in high school whose family life revolved around his mother's amazing home-cooked meals -- spend hours freaking out over how I was going to hide how much I was not eating when he invited me over for dinner. It irritated the shit out of me that I kept getting invited to those dinners and throwing a wrench in my carefully structured life. I understood intellectually how nice it was they wanted to include me in their family meals. I also understood intellectually how rude it was to not eat much when the cook had spent the entire day in the kitchen hand-rolling wontons. I understood all those things intellectually the way a drug addict understands intellectually that drugs are bad for you. The mind-fuck of anorexia is some heavy shit. So yeah, I sometimes found myself wanting to punch my boyfriend for insisting I taste-test his homemade spaghetti sauce with a piece of bread five times over the course of the afternoon, thereby wasting all my dinner calories before dinner ever started.
    • THE PSYCHOLOGY OF FOOD SHAMING - ""Through food, you can make connections to health and bodies and beauty and pretty much any issue you like, but there's a deeper internal drive that, most often, compels us to shame others for eating in a way that doesn't align with our own habits. On one level, it has to do with "moralization of food choice," says Paul Rozin, psychology professor at the University of Pennsylvania....a food-shamer will criticize someone who doesn't meet her definition of "good." The weird thing is that her idea of "good" could just as easily be a chia pod or a full-fat, finished-with-butter chocolate pudding—health doesn't seem to matter."