"1. You look for flaws. When you find someone who might be a good partner, you start looking for their faults. You look for what's wrong instead of what's right. Nobody ever breaks up with you because you don't give them a chance. You're always the one to leave.
2. People think you're shy or reserved. You're hard to get to know because you don't trust people. You're afraid that if you let someone in, you'll be hurt. So you end up lonely instead.
3. You fall hard and fast, over and over again. You're always in a relationship because you don't know who to be as an individual. You're in love with the idea of love, but find it difficult to actually execute. You can't do enough for your partner, and you're a giver. You don't understand why he doesn't appreciate you.
4. You love the chase. You're really attracted to someone when you're trying to catch them, but once you're in the relationship you get bored. You withdraw emotionally, and your partner starts to think they've done something wrong. This is a common expression of abandonment issues in men.
5. You are a perfectionist. If only you get it right, you won't be rejected. Whether "it" is a work project, the way your home looks, how you dress or what your body looks like, perfectionism is a thief. It steals your happiness under the guise of preventing rejection.
If you resonate with any of these, the first step is to be gentle with yourself. Abandonment will start whispering in your ear that you don't deserve anything better and that you don't deserve to be loved. That is a lie, intended to keep you small."
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