Lust vs Love: Do You Know the Difference?

"Pure lust is based solely on physical attraction and fantasy--it often dissipates when the "real person" surfaces. It's the stage of wearing rose colored glasses when he or she "can do no wrong." Being in love doesn't exclude lust. In fact, lust can lead to love. However, real love, not based on idealization or projection, requires time to get to know each other. Here are some signs to watch for to differentiate pure lust from love.

SIGNS OF LUST

1. You're totally focused on a person's looks and body.
2. You're interested in having sex, but not in having conversations.
3. You'd rather keep the relationship on a fantasy level, not discuss real feelings.
4. You want to leave soon after sex rather than cuddling or breakfast the next morning.
5. You are lovers, but not friends.

SIGNS OF LOVE

1. You want to spend quality time together other than sex.
2. You get lost in conversations and forget about the hours passing.
3. You want to honestly listen to each other's feelings, make each other happy.
4. He or she motivates you to be a better person.
5. You want to get to meet his or her family and friends.
6. Another challenge of sexual attraction is learning to stay centered and listen to your gut in the early stages of being with someone. This isn't easy in the midst of hormones surging, but it's essential to make healthy relationship decisions. Here are some tips to help you keep your presence of mind when you're attracted to someone. This needn't pull the plug on passion, but it'll make you more aware so you don't go looking for trouble."

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